Carroll County Fair

There are some things in life that come to define who we are... that somehow make up the fiber of our being.  This past week I was reintroduced to a place that did and still does mean so much to me and that played such a pivotal role in my life.  When I pulled onto the Carroll County Fairgrounds on Friday afternoon at about 2:00 o'clock I suddenly felt a sense of coming home.  It didn't matter really that so much has changed aesthetically- from the way you enter the parking lot to the new, modern buildings.  Enough of the place was the same.  There were still 4-Hers scurrying from their cars proudly carrying their projects to the "red building" so they could nervously stand in front of a judge and get feedback on their hard work.   There was still the kitchen with its home cooked meals where I used to sit and eat breakfast with my dad as soon as they would open in the mornings but usually after he had already made a pass at the exhibit halls with the broom making sure they were ready for the day.   This kitchen is also where Mandy and I would squeeze in last minute studying for the consumer judging contest over tacos and laughter.  There was still a feeling of community as new 4-H moms asked for directions or help deciding which class their child's project should be entered in.  

I remember very clearly the visit to the fair when I was 7 (almost 8) years old.  My parents, brother and I took a fateful walk through the rabbit barn that would change my childhood.  We met a kind woman named Mrs. Jo who would introduce me to my first 4-H project, a Dutch rabbit named Buddy.  From here we would join the 4-H Rabbit Club and not long after - the Deer Park 4-H Club.  It probably seemed like such a small thing to her at the time, chatting with a little girl and her family and introducing them to 4-H and this may sound like I'm exaggerating but that moment was the start of an incredible journey for my family and I.  4-H wasn't just a club that my parents dropped me off at once a month, it wasn't just a place for me to learn to sew, or bake, or take part in community projects.  4-H was something we did as a family.  It gave us time together to learn as a family and to be a part of a bigger family.   Every summer that first week of August my parents would take a weeks vacation to help me get all of my projects to the fair, and often this meant staying up with me until the wee hours of the morning while I sewed on buttons, or frosted a cake.  They both became heavily involved in the program over the years as well and were 4-H volunteers until each of them passed away.  I could go through a list of things that I learned on that fairgrounds from practical things about my projects to lessons about family, friendship, and even puppy love but I couldn't begin to put into words the most important way that place shaped my life but to try to put it simply it filled my heart with joy and warmth.

I knew going back to this place for the first time since losing my parents was going to be hard, and I knew the tears would fall as I pulled into the lot knowing it was my first trip back without either of them... but I also knew that I need to go and that in my heart of hearts I wanted to be there and continue in some way to be involved in the organization that meant so much to my family and I.  I had the absolute honor on Friday of helping to judge Jr Clothing entries (the youngest age group of 4-Hers sewing projects).  Sewing was always my favorite 4-H project and the one where my mom and I spent most of our time together, and my mother for many years was the superintendent of that department so it was extra special for me to be able to do this.  The Carroll County fair uses conference judging meaning each child walks up to the table with their project and as judges you get to talk to them about it, ask them questions about what their favorite parts of it were or hardest new skill was and offer any tidbits you might have to help them with their next project.  I remember this being very nerve wracking as a child but also very educational and often encouraging and I can tell you from the other side of the table it is equally rewarding.  I learned so much from the young girls and boys who shared their projects with me Friday afternoon and it was a true joy to get to do that with a woman who was my 4-H leader when I was a little girl and the mom of one of my best 4-H friends.   I also had the bittersweet experience of helping with the other judges to choose which child's sewing project would win the award that honors my mother: The "Make the Best Better Award", this award is given to a child whose project shows that they have much potential but could maybe use a little push of encouragement to be able to reach that next step.  I was so excited that one of the girls whose project I judged at my table and who I had the pleasure of chatting with about her love of sewing and the challenges she faced with the outfit she made was the recipient of this award.  I hope I'll get the opportunity to go back in years to come and see how she has grown and developed her skills.

I know on the surface I was going to volunteer at the fair and maybe give back just a little to the program that shaped me-- but truly being asked to do that was like an offer to to bring me back into that 4-H family where I knew I would feel love and where I might be able to remember fondly the times I spent there with my parents and while their absence was obvious and painful to me I also felt a closeness to them in that place that filled my soul with happiness.  So to Renee who asked me to help out in the Clothing Department this year, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

A facebook friend of mine posted today this status update: "Sometimes I wonder if these kids at the fair realize that this is one of the best times of their life" and the answer from myself and another former 4-Her was simple.. that they might not realize it now, but they will.  

Summertime

Long time no post.   Summer has come and feels like it is nearly gone already.. how did that happen?  It's been a busy time and I've been lucky to be busy but sometimes it might be nice to have a bit of downtime too.  I don't think I've finished a book in months and needless to say my poor new house has not seen a good cleaning yet.  (That will change soon because we have company coming on Sunday!)

I don't think I've accomplished anything else on my list ... the best of intentions and all that nonsense.  Anyway.. Here are some goals for this week and hopefully I can write next week about how I've accomplished them!

1. workout in some way, shape, or form everyday.  I haven't been keeping up with this lately and I can tell.. both in my energy levels and moods.

2. Get some pictures/ commentary posted about my recent NYC adventures

3. Take a trip down memory lane at the county fair and wrap my thoughts around spending time in a place/event that meant so much to my family growing up.  I think it will be good medicine for me but also the hardest thing I've done in a while.

Rural Life

We've moved!  So we spent last weekend moving and for the first time in a long time I find myself in the country.  Here are my quick observations so far:

1. It's really really really dark at night.. and with boxes still all over the place at my house, leaving a light on is a necessity right now.
2. There doesn't seem to be any such thing as leash laws in the country- I'm guessing they're not needed... we on several occasions have had a little heard of neighborhood dogs running wild in our yard.  One dog is always the same... seems he belongs to everyone on the street.
3. It doesn't matter if the pizza is good - there's only one place to get it in a reasonable driving distance so it is what we will eat when take out is necessary.
4. Birds are really loud, as are wild turkeys and the farm dogs next door.  Haven't actually heard a peep from the horses across the street though.. they are very mannerly neighbors so far.
5. Waking up and having my coffee in the sunroom where I can watch and listen to the nature happening all around me is worth all of those other compromises.

Oh -- and people wave when you pass them on the street while driving, school children wave when you drive by their bus stop-- I'm surprised I haven't seen the outdoor cats in the neighborhood raise their paw at me when I go by.  I've got to get better about doing this (it seems people wave hello all the way up until the point where you get on the main highway-I've been studying this, can you tell?) or I will be known as the unfriendly new girl in town and be shunned from barbeques and pool parties and such.

Running is no longer a solitary chore

I tend to be a music at the highest decible possible/ suffer alone kind of runner.. at least until yesterday when I took my first jaunt with a small group of friends.   I've avoided running anywhere near people I know successfully for several years since I've picked up running (ok --- really walking with some jogging thrown in for good measure most of the time!).  In fact, more often than not I run in the very private space of my basement on my trusty friend/enemy the treadmill.    Don't get me wrong, I actually think I prefer running outdoors (especially somewhere with a view or sand between my toes) but when outside there's always the chance of running into a neighbor when I'm gasping for air, red faced, and feeling like I'm about to fall over... or worse yet the chance to trip, fall, or some other clumsy incident.   So the idea of running with people that I know, and am friends with, that I see on a really regular basis was sort of terrifying to me.  Suddenly though, I found myself without any other commitments and the weather was gorgeous, so I put on my best brave face and said I would go.  And it was fun.. well as fun as running can be.   I proclaimed early and often that I'm super slow, have pretty much no endurance and that I was likely to trip -- I'm long past the days of pretending to be better at something than I am and trying to keep up :-) And guess what - people who are you're friends will understand all that and mostly refrain from poking fun.  Now I'm not particularly great at conversastion when focusing on putting one foot in front of the other at a speed higher than snail but it was nice to have people to chat with during the walking breaks and to curse with when the running got hard.  Misery does love company after all!

Crunch Time

When I started this blog, 1001 days seemed like a huge amount of time to complete 101 things... bwahahahaha.  So how the heck did I find myself with about 7 months left to go and a TON of time consuming items left on my list.  Reading through it just now I think it's safe to say I probably won't get it all done.. but that's ok.  I'll keep working on it until the bitter end anyway.

If I could simply start blogging more regularly that would be an accomplishment in itself...plus it would release me from always blogging about how I'm not blogging enough :)  

It's been an eventful 6 months or so since my last post... some good, some bad.  I'm not going to rehash details because those of you reading this probably know me well enough to know all of the ups and downs... I'll simply say that I'm hoping 2012 (yes - I know we are 4 months in already) will hold happiness and maybe a little less stress.  I prefer to be an optimist so I'm looking forward to whatever fate brings me between now and the end of this little project.  

Let's get down to some accomplishments and goals :)

I did manage to read several great books in the past few months... I won't give full reviews because that would take forever but here is a quick rundown:

1. The Fault in Our Stars by John Green  -- seriously, if you haven't read John Green - do it!  Yes - I'm a little obsessed with him... sure, he would be in my guilt free three, but aside from that - he's an amazing author that will have you laughing through the tears while reading his books.  His first book Looking for Alaska is easily my favorite book I've ever read... but with each new title I'm reminded of why I love his work.  Ok - enough gushing.

2. The Book of Three by Lloyd Alexander -- this is the first in the Chronicles of Prydain series.  A good friend of mine who dutifully read all of John Green's books on my recommendation suggested I try this series which is his favorite.  I loved it!  I'm not generally a fantasy reader but the quirky and lovable characters made this a great read for me.  I think I'll pick up book number two very soon!  I've been meaning to read it for ages just like I've been meaning to update this blog....

3. Outlander by Diana Gabaldon -- several friends recommended this series and I wasn't disappointed... I think I need a month off of work so I can work my way through the rest of them :-)  

4.Explosive Eighteen by Janet Evanovich - I know a lot of people have gotten tired of this series.. after all there are EIGHTEEN of them so far... but I still love Stephanie Plum and watching her struggle humorously through life and with her feelings for two sizzling men.  (I'm team Ranger by the way if anyone cares).

Other Stuff --- 

To be honest I haven't accomplished much else that was on any sort of list of goals (not that those titles were on my list but reading in general always is) but life was busy with other tasks... cleaning out my dads house, packing this one for our move, buying my new truck (the pretty blue love of my life) and just getting through the day to day.  I have gotten a bit of running done but not enough :/

Time to set some goals--

1. Read a book.  Those listed above were all finished a few months ago... its time to finish another already.

2. Run 3 times a week

3. Blog at least once a week

4. Stop and smell the roses - have fun :-)

Yeah - I know none of those are specific items on my list... but I'm working with baby steps here... plus half my house is packed up right now and being in limbo is not the easiest time to accomplish big huge tasks.

Happy New Year, Happy Valentines Day, Happy St Patricks Day, Happy Spring, Happy Easter.... yeah I missed a lot of stuff :-)

Ta Ta For Now!

Sparkles!

Well the only thing I accomplished from my list of three things to accomplish this week was to do something nice for myself... BUT I think that was a pretty important one.   On Monday morning I went and had a pedicure and the girl always winds up talking me into letting her do my nails too (I think because she's always horrified by their condition and takes personal responsibility for my horrible nails- both hands and feet).   While I was relaxing away I vaguely remember her saying something about my nails being "shiny" and I must have nodded while watching a morning talk show on the nail salon's TV because before I knew it I had a pretty intense layer of glitter polish on top of the chosen color :-).  So here is my tip of the week - pay attention when someone is doing something that affects your appearance!  I'm pretty easy going about my nails though and knew I would mess them up promptly and have to remove it all anyway so I said what the heck - a sparkly week it shall be! 

Other than that I read a few books for a workshop I'm going to on Saturday about books for teens but I think I will wait and blog about them as a group after the workshop.  I always enjoy the books for this workshop but I'm also always happy to go back to reading things that aren't "assigned".  Though I must say I read my first John Green book for a workshop and that certainly was worth it and created a groupie/ bit of a crazy stalker fan out of me :-)

Not sure I'll make any goals for the weekend-- it's going to be a pretty busy one.  My other half has a birthday coming up and a high school reunion this weekend on top of a visit to my dads and work happy hour tonight... so aside from all the scheduled events I think my goal will just be to sit back, relax, and breathe.

Have a great weekend!

Fake Blogger

I'm definitely feeling like I'm not a really blogger... this page hasn't been updated in months...AND when I look at my "101 things to do list" it's pretty much at the same level of completion as it was all those weeks ago.  I wish I had some great excuse but I really don't.  Life just gets in the way - and when that happens it is generally the day to day mundane life getting in the way that doesn't exactly spark creativity.  

So here we are again...at least I'm a consistently bad blogger - I feel like this is the gazillionth "I'm terrible at this" post since I started this thing :-)   Maybe I need to make an appointment with myself a few times a week to do this. 

Anyway - Like I said - not much accomplished on the list front.  In fact I just went back and read through the list and some of the things left on it are sounding dreadfully boring to me at the moment.  I think I already picked all the low hanging fruit, and tackled some of the more fun stuff... and now I'm left with things that generally sound like work.  Hmmm, not sure that was really my intention when starting this project.
  
There are a few things though that I am interesting in accomplishing in the short term: 1. Read Gone With the Wind (it's downloaded onto my nook - I have a vacation coming up in November - I have NO excuse!) 2. Take a dulcimer lesson.   As soon as kickball season is over and I have another weeknight free I think I'm gonna give this a real go.  In fact I think I will put it on my goals for the week to make the phone call to set it up!

I have actually been doing some running in the past few months... I'm still not running solid lengths of time but even with walking breaks I can see that I'm getting faster and as long as I see progress I'm happy with baby steps!

I've also been doing a fair amount of reading - though nothing on my list.  I've  been reading bunches of Teen Romances for a workshop I'm facilitating at this weekend and I'm also in the middle of The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin.  I have a feeling that when I do finally finish this book it will inspire some blog posts.   The books is exactly what it sounds like - a woman takes a year of her life devoting each month to a theme/goal for becoming happier and writes about it.   Not all of it is earth-shattering, but even the stuff that should seem like common sense is good to be reminded of and think about once in a while. 


I think that about catches everyone up.  So here are my goals for the week:

1. Call about dulcimer lessons.
2. Blog again on Wednesday and Friday mornings
3. Do something nice for myself.  This is sort of cheating -- I already know that as soon as the place opens at 10am I'm going to sneak in a pedicure before work today :)