In the last few years I've had the "opportunity" to gain some strength this way whether I wanted to or not. Life puts obstacles in the way for all of us sometimes...it's just the nature of living. There were many times I thought there was no way I would get through to the other side of a situation at all, much less a stronger, happier, and a better person. But I assure you it happens.
I can remember the day very clearly where I had to let go of my mom, and I had to find the words to let her know it was ok, that I would be ok, that dad would be ok... and I wasn't sure I believed any of those words that somehow in the moment I needed them came out of my mouth clearly and without quivering. I just didn't know how I was going to face the world without my best friend, I didn't know how I was going to get myself through it much less my pop. I didn't know how I was going to give her eulogy and convey exactly how special she was with just my words. I didn't know how I would get through the day without being able to pick up the phone to call her just to touch base. I didn't know how I was going to do a lot of practical things either... like make sure my pop made it to all his doctors appointments or ate healthy (Hah!) or didn't go out driving on an icy night when he shouldn't.
I can also remember not that long ago thinking that I didn't know how to live on my own. Or that I wasn't sure "alone" was something I could emotionally handle. In the first 35 years of my life I never spent even a week living alone. I didn't know how to do it without mom and pop there to tell me I could do it, that I was strong, and tough, and that this new chapter of my life would be better than I could imagine. In my head I knew I had all the skills to do it...but I was still scared, self doubting, unsure I could be happy.
On a lighter note I wasn't sure this girl could ever be a runner of any sort... after all I didn't run my first mile without stopping until I was in my mid-thirties and I'm sure it looked pretty ugly by the end! But like most other things I find that if I put one foot in front of the other... things just happen.
So today I look back at these things and smaller things like accomplishing something new at the gym, picking up a new hobby, achieving a goal at work and realize that I do (and we all do) have what it takes to get things done that we didn't think were possible. There's an inner strength in me that sometimes I forget is there...and there is an amazing group of people in my life that fuel that strength and confidence when I struggle with being able to do it for myself.
So whatever it is, however physically hard and grueling or emotionally brutal it seems - know that it can be done. Find a way to tap into the inner strength, and let others help, always let others lift you up when you need it. There is no weakness in sharing the weight on your shoulders with the people who love you. And my newest mantra... challenge yourself and let others challenge you. I'm looking at you big brother.. and your Warrior Dash invite.
It's on :-)
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